The end.
It’s come as quite a shock to me to learn that I’ve got the potential to be one of those women still controversially breastfeeding a toddler; if my son hadn’t had other ideas of course. I always intended stopping at a year and it was his birthday last week, but my fantasies of having a ’special’ last feed and stopping on my own terms have been shattered by a throat infection. In pain and stuffed with snot, my baby hasn’t had the energy or the ability to feed properly for the last few days and so I feel like the decision to stop has been made for me.
There’s no point encouraging him to feed again just so I can stop in the way I wanted to, so we’re done. And I have to admit I’m sadder than I thought I would be. The only thing I can compare it to is the feeling of being dumped; I feel tearful, and a little bit empty. My relationship with my son is about much more than just feeding but nonetheless, that aspect of our relationship is now gone, and I will miss it. The quiet, shared time at the end of the day; watching him drift off to sleep, twirling his silky hair and marvelling at his porcelain skin. To begin with, it was so hard to continue with breastfeeding – it was painful and tiring and I couldn’t imagine making it to six weeks, never mind six months. But as hard as those early days were, giving up is harder.
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About Claire
Hello! I’m Claire and welcome to MumUnplugged! I started this blog in 2008 following the birth of my son; I was bored on maternity leave from my job as a magazine editor, and besides feeling a pathological urge to just write something, I wanted to put my own experiences as a first time mum out there for others to share. I’m just a normal mum like any other – I have good days and bad days, days when I feel confident in my ability to raise this little human I created and others when I wonder why on earth I ever thought I could handle it! The most important thing I’ve learned from becoming a mum is that there’s nothing like advice from other mums who’ve been in your shoes – and I hope that by reading my experiences and those of others, visitors to MumUnplugged will find inspiration, advice and support for their journey through motherhood. Through my career in publishing I’ve also developed a passion for trend-spotting and tracking down the latest products so you’ll also find lots of news, reviews, fashion, topical features and much more. I really hope you enjoy the site – don’t forget to check out our forums (coming soon!) and keep your eyes peeled for great competitions and giveaways. If there’s anything you’d like to see on MumUnplugged then I’d love to hear from you – email mumunplugged@googlemail.com, follow me on Twitter, check out the Facebook page - or just leave me a comment!